Unhappy bride

I am a former recipient of bridal magazines. I have a wild imagination. Put that winning combination together and you get funny stories for the most important time in a bride's life.
Jenny happily strutted down the runway when she realized that she finally found a dress that could go from the chapel to the club.

Jenny happily strutted down the runway when she realized that she finally found a dress that could go from the chapel to the club.

April walked away from everyone when she was informed that she would have to clean up all of the flower petals.

April walked away from everyone when she was informed that she would have to clean up all of the flower petals.

Dana hoped the feather fascinator would distract from the lopsidedness of her wedding dress.

Dana hoped the feather fascinator would distract from the lopsidedness of her wedding dress.

If Katie had to hear another Flo Rida song during the pre-wedding photo shoot she would strangle someone.  

If Katie had to hear another Flo Rida song during the pre-wedding photo shoot she would strangle someone.  

Gwen didn’t realize that being a zombie started at the waist and moved up.  

Gwen didn’t realize that being a zombie started at the waist and moved up.  

Dana snapped her fingers until she got a hand cramp, but it was no use the flower girl refused to be her human slave for the day.

Dana snapped her fingers until she got a hand cramp, but it was no use the flower girl refused to be her human slave for the day.

Hillary had been wearing SPF 90 since the engagement, but she would never achieve the level of whiteness she aspired to have.

Hillary had been wearing SPF 90 since the engagement, but she would never achieve the level of whiteness she aspired to have.

The photographer was becoming a pain in Lana’s ass and she had no qualms of posing in this way to remind him. 

The photographer was becoming a pain in Lana’s ass and she had no qualms of posing in this way to remind him. 

The church was so hot that Anita had to drape her arm over her head to let her arm pits breathe.  

The church was so hot that Anita had to drape her arm over her head to let her arm pits breathe.  

Optical illusions were the new hot thing in wedding photography, and Charlene was instructed to make it look like she was propping her arm on the mantle.  

Optical illusions were the new hot thing in wedding photography, and Charlene was instructed to make it look like she was propping her arm on the mantle.